"before darkness emerged you spoke to me
love
of love
of life
then
of death
by death you walked
by death enlightened..."
-confusedain '99
+ Dissect +
Lorelai: It was a mistake.
Emily: A mistake?! You call that a mistake!?
Lorelai: Well, I tried calling it "Al", but it would only answer to "mistake".
+ Me +
Longing for an eternal union
+ Desires +
+ firstly to find myself
+ 10 days trip to Europe, esp Spain
+ Santorini, Greece
+ The Chocolate Buffet at Fullerton Hotel
+ experience snow
+ Work Overseas
+ A very healthy body...and mind
+ a tv set in my bedroom
+ a lomo
+ donate blood at least once in a lifetime
+ be a volunteer
+ Things I've been said i look like +
chinese(NO.1)
japanese
taiwanese(!! lol)
phillippino
thai
myanmar
cambodian
vietnamese
indonesian(specifically, indo maid!)
malaysian
nepalese
China Chinese (NO!!!...)
i'll be leaving for melaka tomorrow whats with the big hoo ha abt the floodings and stuff.. we've been kept updated abt that and currently no big issue there. we're just slightly afraid of the journey thats all.. coz of the loop holes and stuff... juz pray fer us :D and since i'll be gone for the next few days... i juz wanna wish everyone a very happy new year and selamat ari raya haji. all the memories of this yr will definitely be cherished and i hope more of such will surface next year... my resolution for this year?? be nice to ppl and less anti-social... :P god bless everyone aite??
i've been tracking my transportation spenditure and my god the findings are quite astounding! (to me anyway... :P)
i'm using almost $100 of my salary per month on travelling alone... and its not like i go town every dae!! whats up with dat? i shud start cutting down on bus riding. i mean walking to admiralty from seagate (thats the best i can give! :P) i'll be losing weight, gaining stamina and even saving money. hhm... quite beneficial i muz say... haha... (getting desperate there arent i?) oh well...
i've been planning to have a transformation of style, y'know coz i'm sick of looking at myself in the mirror (eww...so ugly!) i'm so geared up coz like i've said.. i've planned it but i just wish i can do it now u'know. juz so people wont think i'm copying others. argh!!! but there's always a timing. always a special reason, an occasion. ok... i'm babbling. i dun think you're understanding any of this but its ok. for my own sanity, dont.
carlos ruiz zafon the shadows of the wind its been days(coming to a week actually) since i'm done with that book and yet, its intensely captivating story hasnt left my mind i want more what happen to julian next? how would he look like? ficticious aws it is, it still keeps me wondering. imagining the looks of the wonderful characters. its hard to find a book that can keep you entertained... even when u've finished reading it. ~sigh... i'd better bury my obsessive compulsive brain in another book before i drive myself crazy (!!!)
kinda funny.. but have u ever read those books esp romance types? and they usually have these erm... very detailed sex scene... about how the protagonist would be unconsiously slipped his hands on her silky smooth baby skin thighs and then i shall not continue? i've always hated stuff like dat but i cant seem to avoid it... it kinda led me to reading thriller, murder,classic novels (which i dun mind, seriously) (less chances of having those scenes appear before ur eyes) ok, here's my point... there's phone sex, maybe chat (??) sex and reading those ewww scenes kinda feels like u're having novel (haha) sex with the novelist rite?? :P i like reading romances...but i dun like skipping pages, see? better to not touch those genres at all if i dun like skipping pages... ~sigh.... passion's great but detailing minutely over what happens on their bed...urgh..
carlos ruiz zafon the shadows of the wind. neve shall i forget the book... he was a screenwriter before attempting writing... so can u imagine how good it is already?? lol... :P
wow...vivocity was kinda fun... these pictures as proofs... :P nah.. the best part was dipping in our feet under the hot afternoon sun then off to sushi tei to try out their sushis served on belt... then to orchard rd to see the lights... it was ok la i guess my most memorable christmas lights was when i was in pri sch... they were so much better... wat happen to those great decorations??? ~sigh...
alexis bledel. she's so cute. i could fall in love with her.
today is da day to commemorate christina aguilera's achievements in da music industry... how she contributed to the history of entertainment and music... loving all that she has to offer.. here are some of my fav performances of her... enjoy...
walkaway at david letterman's show... confirm live one! heeeh
1st thought. "its starting to go downhill here..." lets rewind. face it, things are fine i'm blessed yet when i dun get that one desired thing suddenly nothing seems right what seems like a petty issue turned exaggeratingly horrendous i seem to forget the other things i've already owned and if i dun haf my desire fulfilled i'd retreat take a step back and whine cry, wallow pathetically my thoughts suck i know its not right thats my concious working and yet i cant help it. thats my depression kicking in. *the stuff u say to urself when u're blinded by obsession for possession. ~shakes head, heavy sigh....
thats me, yeah, da shortest girl... so sad...hahah...
the best part abt yesterday was i forgot i had an exam the next day and i had to work the nite before, so i grabbed my module three book hoping to read. clutching to watever hope i'm left with of passing :P . only to realise 3hrs before the exam starts that i've been reading the wrong book!!! darn! it wasnt module 3, it was module one!! argh!! devastation sweeped my hope entirely out the window, thank you. :P absent-minded. me.blur blur.me.die la like dat.how to survive??
i've been putting on weight more swiftly than i lost it :P. or was it my weighing machine playing tricks on my eyes (bloody evil!!)? imagine in one week 3kg? superb rite?? i shud be like writing a book abt how to gain weight @ fast speed...darn.
and overspend my budget(typically). hey,what can i say?? a mere girl like me contributing to the country's economy.its a tough job but someone's gotta do it rite?? ahha...
And you Bring me to my knees Again All the times That I could beg you please In vain All the times That I felt insecure For you But I leave My burdens at the door
But I'm on the outside And I'm looking in I can see through you See your true colors 'Cause inside your ugly Your ugly like me I can see through you See to the real you
All the times That I felt like this won't end Was for you And I taste What I could never have It's from you All the times That I've tried My intentions Full of pride But I waste More time than anyone
All the times That I've cried All this wasted It's all inside And I feel All this pain Stuffed it down It's back again And I lie Here in bed All alone I can't mend But I feel Tomorrow wil be OK
outside-staind
everytime i wish for something, there will always be someone else who will snatch it away. teasing me, giving me stupid smirks.waving my desires in front of my eyes.they got it, and i dun. i feel so fucked.and fuck is supposed to be bliss. hell.i nid to get away from my hallucinations. my sad pathetic spoilt brattish baby whines ringing in my bloody ears. its irritating.stop it!
