"before darkness emerged you spoke to me
love
of love
of life
then
of death
by death you walked
by death enlightened..."
-confusedain '99
+ Dissect +
Lorelai: It was a mistake.
Emily: A mistake?! You call that a mistake!?
Lorelai: Well, I tried calling it "Al", but it would only answer to "mistake".
+ Me +
Longing for an eternal union
+ Desires +
+ firstly to find myself
+ 10 days trip to Europe, esp Spain
+ Santorini, Greece
+ The Chocolate Buffet at Fullerton Hotel
+ experience snow
+ Work Overseas
+ A very healthy body...and mind
+ a tv set in my bedroom
+ a lomo
+ donate blood at least once in a lifetime
+ be a volunteer
+ Things I've been said i look like +
chinese(NO.1)
japanese
taiwanese(!! lol)
phillippino
thai
myanmar
cambodian
vietnamese
indonesian(specifically, indo maid!)
malaysian
nepalese
China Chinese (NO!!!...)
went to z*** a couple of daes ago it was ok la... gt free entry complimentary of shaz's fren but we didnt even see da event!! lol... we went to other room instead... haha! by 10 it was crowded as hell we left @ 12 plus believe or not!! by eleven we were shoved to a very small corner, much to my dismay... as nt enuf space was left for me to groove on. as usual, my arms, hands keeps on slapping ppl's heads's foreheads, backs.... u name it, lol... but it was ok...its all abt having fun tee hee.... halfway thru da blaring music i was dancing barefooted... i'm telling you, dancing on heels is soo bloody tough esp when u're executing hip hop moves...lol i was invited last min, i guess so my attire was quite inappopriate i was having dinner with vincent, so dress and jeans ...hip hop?? lol.... nooooo! i noticed a few stares from some ppl... nt exactly sure whether it was coz of my attire and dance moves or juz simply my dance moves...lol... imagine a bespectacled girl wearing a dress with jeans barefooted dancing vigorously to hip hop....lol.. that is sooo wrong!! but i ended up taking off my specs anyway coz one time i was so rough it juz fell on the floor... haha....
this is the new begining ppl... let me introduce myself i am fffuuuccckkkking stupid yes just fffuuukkkiiingggg stupid
in a matter of seconds my ipod songs of 1980 has left to just 52... all thanks to this great fucking girl... me yes.... i've been doing a lot of stupid things lately being stupid plainly maybe i shud juz die stupid ppl shudnt walk on earth... they just contaminate the intellignet ones why am i sooooo fuccckkkiinnng overreacting of losing like, abt 95 percent of my songs and almost 40 percent of my videos?? oh simple... i'm stupid remember????? fffffuuuuccckkkkiinnnngggg stupid juz fit me... no more the confused girl coz i now finally know what i am closing to senility i am simply ffffuuuucccckkkkkkiiiinggggggg stupid ppl!!!! as long as i live i will never get out this.... i shud jus end it aaaaarrrrrrrrrrrrrggggggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhh
actually dis doesnt make sense la... coz u cant categorise eveything as girlish or guyish... ur quirkiness adds character... duh... :P
GUY-ISH [x] you own a jersey [ ] you like being sweaty [ ] you love mud [x] you've played at least one sport on a team [x] you've played more than 1 sport for fun [ ] you hate pink [x] you love hoodies and jeans [ ] pranks are fun [ ] dogs are better than cats [ ] its funny when people get hurt x)
total = 4
[ ] shopping is torture [x] pulling heads off dolls isnt creepy..its fun [ ] you dont cry [ ] sad movies suck [ ] girl drama is stupid [ ] painting your nails is weird [ ] you own a ps2 [ ] you own an xbox [ ] you own a gamecube [ ] you like to watch porn [x] you like sexy girls
Total = 2
[x] you used to be obsessed with power rangers [ ] you watch sports center [x] you watch sports on tv sometimes [x] gory movies are the best! [ ] you arent scared of anything [ ] you take part in "male stuffs" [ ] you only go to your dad for advice [ ] you own like a trillion baseball caps [ ] you're not sensitive [ ] no pain no gain
Total = 3
[ ] you like going to football games [ ] night games rock [ ] spiders and bugs are cool [ ] you like to freak out your sister or brother [ ] you used to or do collect basketball cards [x] baggy pants are cool [ ] you get sports illustrated/other sports/guy magazine [x] fire is cool [ ] you don't babysit [x] you're immature
Total = 3
[ ] its kinda weird to have sleepovers with a bunch of people [x] green, black, red or blue or silver are your favorite colors [ ] romantic comedies are boring [ ] you hate dressing up sometimes [ ] you dont care about your hair [x] you love to go crazy and not care what people think [x] climbing is fun [x] contact sports like football are fun
total = 4
Now add the numbers up x2 and re-post with your score as: "I'm 36% guyish"
~ ~~ ~~~ ~~~~ ~~~~~ ~~~~ ~~~ ~~ ~
GIRL-ISH
[x] you wear lip gloss. [x] you shop [x] you wear eyeliner [ ] you buy different colored shirts [ ] you wear halters and tube tops
total: 5
[ ] you dont like shopping at hot topic [ ] you wear the color pink(if i have to) [x] you consider cheerleading a sport [ ] you hate wearing the color black [x] you love hanging at the mall
total: 2
[ ] you like getting manicures and/or pedicures [x] you wear jewelery [x] skirts are a part of your wardrobe [x] you take a long time doing your hair [x] shopping is one of your favorite hobbies
total:5
[ ] you hate the movie star wars [x] you cry in movies [x] you are/were in cheerleading, gymnastics, or dance [X] it takes you more than 1/2 hour to get dressed and put on other accesories [ ] you smile a lot more than u should
total: 4
Add them up, multiply them by 5, and post as "i am 80% girlish"
is it possible to be depressed over just one thing? muz it be over sth that has been accumulated over the years and not just out of the blue? is it possible to be depressed when everything that u haf ever wanted is within ur grasp? when nothing could get in your way? is it possible that on the outside, everything is so opposite from what is on the inside? that a masquerade is what we play unconciously everyday? is it possible to be wanting to lead a blissful life yet loving to be in a depression state?
spectacular spectacular... nutin betta to describe it than this, i guess... i'm so glad i caught the phantom of the opera...made dear got hooked to it too!!! it was one of my fav stories of all time... esp this mysterious character so famously known as the phantom... i read the book and fell in love w/ it... he wasnt just a horrifying man in love with a girl... he was a deformed man... a genius who'd never make a mistake twice in his life...a brilliant man cursed to walk upon this earth donning a mask on his face(like where else... duh!) i didnt expect the musical to be sooo bloody stunning but i did wondered what could have caused it to cost so much... well, i gt my ans... and i'm well satisfied with it... i feel like watching it again... but the 1st time was already making such a dent in my savings acc. ahh... the production was superb sia... with state of the art props.... wah... totally worth it... perfect... so beautiful so sad so romantic yet so haunting...so very the gothic... haha...the sets was so unbelieavable...almost 3d.... wah....and who could forget the music... ~sigh...
i've been reading books lately and so much of them about cheating girlfriends spousals... what the hell... its brainwahsing me... everytime i read them, i think abt dear...abt him thinking abt another girl being w/ another girl...so insane... you know its impossible but there's always that nagging feeling... y'know... i trust him... our relationsip is so special... best friends before lovers.... we could talk abt anything from naked guys to naked girls (haha!... we;re not into open reationship tho..:P) but u get wat i mean rite? he is so careful. never wanting me to feel leftout... never wanting me to feel threaten by other girls...always so supportive...my confidant...yet i'm still insecure.
when i was supposed to do my electronics research...
so i managed to finish these in, like 20 mins... hehe... roughly the same as the previous ones but i had wanted graffitti words there... so thanks to the great pimp-text.com generator... my wishes are fufilled... i reckon these are better altho i must add sheepishly that they're amateurs' works.... like who cares!! hah! so yeah... enjoy them... :P p/S: for a low self esteem girl like me,its surprising i haf soo much pix of myself... haha... all the pix of me in the confused wasnt erm... pre-meditated... i simply tot of putting them up together coz they look so fit haha... :P
stuff i've been doin lately...taking pix of dear's car... and editing pix...plus others haha...been so tired lately...pushing my body to the max... whats wrong with me?? :P plus i went out with maryam(my v. own nurse... if i ever nid one...:P) and we went bodyshop shopping plus letting her have a taste of wat chocolate fondue means...(it cant be defined by words alone, can they?... its the experience that counts... haha!!)
