"before darkness emerged
you spoke to me
love
of love
of life
then
of death
by death you walked
by death enlightened..."
-confusedain '99

+ Dissect +

Lorelai: It was a mistake. Emily: A mistake?! You call that a mistake!? Lorelai: Well, I tried calling it "Al", but it would only answer to "mistake".

+ Me +

Longing for an eternal union

+ Desires +

+ firstly to find myself
+ 10 days trip to Europe, esp Spain
+ Santorini, Greece
+ The Chocolate Buffet at Fullerton Hotel
+ experience snow
+ Work Overseas
+ A very healthy body...and mind
+ a tv set in my bedroom
+ a lomo
+ donate blood at least once in a lifetime
+ be a volunteer

+ Things I've been said i look like +

chinese(NO.1)
japanese
taiwanese(!! lol)
phillippino
thai
myanmar
cambodian
vietnamese
indonesian(specifically, indo maid!)
malaysian
nepalese
China Chinese (NO!!!...)

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Rina + Shaz + Audrey + kak pi + affordable gadgets + Wei Jun + Yilin + faz victoria +

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+ Previous Posts +

i died everyday
Of Facebook statuses and diaries
I wish i have enough courage to just jump and die
Gone for too long
Change
Broken
The Mind
Resolution
old saying
Happie Halloween

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Friday, April 23, 2010
Tee Vee Over Food

its time i stop binge-ing on food
70% of my pay goes to snacks

i have to set a goal for myself

i want a flat screen tv
(budget = $499 -Akira oso can!)

i want the Sony Ericsson Aino phone
(juz because it has the Ain in the model name... HAH!)

i want a dvd/cd player
(any cheap brand will do...)

So Ain,

We have a lot to Achieve

*nods head...

execution of plan starts

right after i pay my sch fees... lol....
shud be able to get by end of this year


gambateh!!!!!!!

*does an awesome kungfu master 'ready-to-attack' pose

Tuesday, April 20, 2010
reality bytes...me

as i leaf through the recruit section last sat's edition,
i felt so depressed.almost all the job positions with dip in biz studies/mgmt have things to do with liaising with customers or communicating with people.

i hate it.
thinking back, i wonder if i've made the wrong choice.
im so freaking scared of people
juz the tot of telemktg scares the crap out of me.
its like im having some sort of nervous breakdown.
or anxienty attack.
i dun even know how to say no to people
how am i gg to survive in this people-infested world?
i feel so shitty...

i feel like i juz want to drop everything. school, the current job tt i took
and run back to my sweet old comfort of factory job.
where i dun have to communicate with people much.
i dun care how much i earn.
i dun want to get married or have children.
i cant even take care of myself.
im literally in fear when im talking to people for God's sake.
how can i go on from here.
really.
how?

this is sad.
and very pathetic.

***runs to her bed and cry.......

Friday, April 16, 2010
random is awesome

Random pictures.... pictures tt tickles me bones,pictures tt struck me emotionally, and of course... those meaningful ones... let me share these with you guys.


Stumbled Across Squirrel Espionage Training Facility
very cute puffer fish :D look like smiling no?



be my penguin?
angora rabbit. seriously can u see the eyes... :P

i want this necklace... me and my wants again
i want this mirror too....
and if i have a baby, im definitely gonna get me this... dare u say its not adorable?
i want this ear
why have i tot of this earlier... ingenious rite?
be surprise...very surprise
ooohhh... tt is so gangsta....
look carefully. i mean really, look carefully
another great idea...
look closely again...
this rawks!
true...true indeed
me trying to look young
me in my (as many have said) lawyer look... lol...



me in my so called indon look ahhaah....
me very the cute cuzzie, shasha...







the one i told u i wanted these shoes?? well i gt them in grey... no black... so sad..
in black tights.. works well :D
this was before i left the co. i filled up the container in chocolate m&m and it was truly well received by all my ex-colleagues... :D they helped me finish them up. so colourful rite?
the teddy can was my candy dumper... not rubbish bin ok! i was more creative than that :P i'd dump all my sweets and candies and anyone can take it :D
this was the result of a freak accident. i was holding my pen the other way around... with the tip facing my palm. i knocked the back of the pen against my table and the tip of the pen managed to poked my palm... pain lor...
see me candies??? my chocolates on the other hand, was fast depleting.
my cute dunno what... grooves to hiphop music... :D



the clip thong thing to hold the escargo shell...










in daylight u can see clearer what it looks like

benny/crystal's car.... the civic and the picnic

when we were at the sg discovery ctr


played with these... the recoil was not bad...


anyway... as of currently im unemployed... yay..

the stupid thing i mentioned earlier??
yup this was it...

stupid coz i didnt look for job then i juz quit.
to me , there will always be jobs out there.
its a matter of how choosy you are.
whether u want the kind of pay, or u want the kind of job scope.
sum times, when i hear ppl being unemployed for months on end,
i find it hard to believe. its better to get paid than no pay at all rite?
tts why i was never worried about my situation.
i could always fall back to factory job.
yeah.im simply a factory kind of girl.

but anyway, last mth or so i went to the job fair.
i approached this era booth asking about the mktg exec position.
it was only when i sat and talked with him tt i realised its juz a sales position.
i didnt want tt. funnily enough, when i told him i would much prefer an admin post. he quickly told me "you're hired" lol...
he was in need of a person to help him do some admin stuff for him.
sth like a personal asst thing.

interesting no?
had a chat with him today.
it was a very wide job scope...
so wide im quite worried i may not be able to handle all the things...
but thinking about it makes me feel like i wanna take up the challenge.
not only i will be doing the job alone, mostly away from people,
(i mite have no colleagues....coz i werk directly under him)
but i will also have total independence...
wow... nvr would i have tot of becoming someone's so called personal asst.
this would definitely be an experience for me.