currently reading sylvia plath's journals
ooh... sneaky!! haha
but i think she's inspiring...
i mean.. it made her so vulnerable...
full of failures (rejections!) depressions
wow.... made me wonder why i am such a coward
even a great poet like her was rejected
thousands of times...

in a festive season like this
i shud be busy w/ preparations
or even, already prepared my stuff.. aahhhh
we're days away and i havent even
bought a decent baju kebaya
neither shoes nor bag!! argh....
i've fallen behind w/ da time...
and my room!its atrocious!!!
can a girls' room be as disgusting as mine??
aahhh.... panic panic!
and festive cleaning in my room
has caused a recent discovery
of ants farm... yes!!! in my room!!!...
even worst... in a box of treasures i kept...
that contains all of the things dear gave me
through our 3 yrs plus 2gether...
i cried like a baby.. :P
i mean i haf this phobia of ants and
i cant save it coz i dun dare to touch it
i dun understand.... i dun keep any food inside it
why would the ants made a nest out of it...
aahhh... the thought of it is disgusting..
like a nightmare realised...
its sad so sad...its a sad sad situation...

a colleague one time saw me
writin poetry...
and he suggested me to compose song lyrics fer his band
whether or not it was out of politeness
i was still touched... honoured...
hey!! someone invited me to compose a song!!!
someone trusted my poetry...
despite havent reading any of my piece yet(!!!)
ahahha....
it feels gud.... haaha :P

which then drove me to find all my old poetry book
i think i've lost it (argh!)
and i chanced upon lots of journals
that i wrote throughout my journeys of life
funny how childish immature i was then and still now
i read my entries of the few mths i was just w/ dear
interesting how in love i was w/ him and still now
it doesnt feel like 3 years...
sometimes it feels like just a few days...
this feeling so strong, like no other.
i love you, dear....